Funny Phobias Most of the people in the world have a fear of one kind or another. While most people suffer from pathophobia (fear of disease), monophobia (fear of being alone), glossophobia (fear of public speaking), algophobia (fear of pain), taphephobia (fear of being buried alive), and many more, there are also some less popular phobias. At the end of this essay, I have compiled a list of the phobias that I find amusing. There are many people in the world that suffer from polyphobia, which simply means to have more than one fear. Not so common, people may suffer from antinomial phobias. For example, there are some people that live with vestiophobia (fear of clothes) and gymnophobia (fear of nudity). Another example is people with achluophobia (fear of darkness) and photophobia (fear of light). Watch out guys, within the next seven years, you will probably get married and you will suffer from pentheraphobia, which is one of the scariest phobias in existence, the fear of your mother-in-law! Not all phobias have been in existence for thousands of years. I’m sure that brontophobia (fear of thunder and lightning), febriphobia (fear of fever), and ophidiophobia (fear of snakes) have existed since the Black Ages. Some of the phobias that have formed in the last two centuries would be electrophobia (fear of electricity), motorphobia (fear of automobiles), and aviophobia (fear of flying). In 1945, a brand new phobia was quickly created and escalated drastically in the 1950’s. It is called nucleomituphobia, which is the fear or nuclear weapons. But that’s not the newest phobia in existence as of today. This threat is called cyberphobia (fear of computers). In mild cases, people may be afraid to use a computer or an ATM. In today’s society, technology is deeply integrated. Computers are used in calculators, cars, microwaves, power tools, and many more. So to the cyberphobic, I say, “Get over it, or go to the extreme and move away from the city, abandon your car, hand build your home, hand pump your water, build your fires, and hunt for your own food!” If you have a phobia, there is still hope for you. Phobias can be cured. Remember when you were a child and suffered from clinophobia (fear of going to bed) because of bogyphobia (fear of the bogeyman), achluophobia (fear of darkness), and lachanophobia (fear of vegetables). Now chances are good that you go to bed without checking your closet or looking under your bed, that you don’t go ballistic if the lights go out, and that you eat a salad every so often. Phobias can deeply impact a person’s life. A person with chronophobia (fear of time) probably won’t make it to their 10:00AM dentist appointment on time. A person with chaetophobia (fear of hair) is most likely bald, has no eyelashes, no eyebrows, etc. A person with cibophobia (fear of food) usually hasn’t eaten in weeks and could easily be anorexic. This proves how serious and destructive phobias can be. If you do suffer from any strange phobias, I would suggest calling one-eight-hundred-phobias, for arithmophobics (people who fear numbers) or for logophobics (people who fear words), 1-800-635-1317. This phone number is for entertainment purposes only. Now on a more serious note, in all the years I’ve lived and all the knowledge I’ve acquired, I can only find one, yes one, valid fear. This fear is called zeusophobia, which is the fear of God. In Heaven, the false phobias are destroyed, but in Hell they can be amplified. I still find it hilarious, though, that these phobias exist, especially since someone must have experienced these fears so they could be valid phobias. So if you experience arachibutyrophobia, you’re probably one in a million, but you’re still out there. some fears may be listed more than once A Ablutophobia- Fear of washing or bathing Aerophobia- Fear of swallowing air Ambulophobia- Fear of walking Anablephobia- Fear of looking up Anemophobia- Fear of wind Anthrophobia- Fear of flowers Arachibutyrophobia- Fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of the mouth. Arithmophobia- Fear of numbers Aulophobia- Fear of flutes Auroraphobia- Fear of Northern Lights B Barophobia- Fear of gravity Basophobia- Fear of walking Batophobia- Fear of being close to high buildings Bibliophobia- Fear of books Blennophobia- Fear of slime Bogyphobia- Fear of the bogeyman C Cathisophobia- Fear of sitting Catoptrophobia- Fear of mirrors Chaetophobia- Fear of hair Chionophobia- Fear of snow Chromatophobia- Fear of colors Chronophobia- Fear of time Chronomentrophobia- Fear of clocks Cibophobia- Fear of food Clinophobia- Fear of going to bed Cnidophobia- Fear of string D Deciophobia- Fear of making decisions Dendrophobia- Fear of trees Dextrophobia- Fear of objects at the right side of the body Didaskaleinophobia- Fear of school E Eisoptrophobia- Fear of mirrors Eleutherophobia- Fear of freedom Eosophobia- Fear of daylight Epistemophobia- Fear of knowledge Ergophobia- Fear of work Ereuthophobia- Fear of the color red G Geliophobia- Fear of laughter Geniophobia- Fear of chins Genuphobia- Fear of knees Geumaphobia- Fear of taste Gnosiophobia- Fear of knowledge Graphophobia- Fear of writing H Heliophobia- Fear of the sun Helmintophobia- Fear of being infested with worms Hemophobia- Fear of blood Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia- Fear of long words Homichlophobia- Fear of fog Hypnophobia- Fear of sleep I Ichthyophobia- Fear of fish Ideophobia- Fear of ideas K Kainophobia- Fear of anything new Kathisophobia- Fear of sitting down L Lachanophobia- Fear of vegetables Leukophobia- Fear of the color white Levophobia- Fear of objects to the left side of the body Linonophobia- Fear of string Logophobia- Fear of words M Melanophobia- Fear of the color black Melophobia- Fear of music Metrophobia- Fear of poetry Mnemophobia- Fear of memories Mottephobia- Fear of moths N Nebulaphobia- Fear of fog Neophobia- Fear of anything new Nephophobia- Fear of clouds Nomatophobia- Fear of names O Octophobia- Fear of the number 8 Ommetaphobia- Fear of eyes Oneirophobia- Fear of dreams Ophthalmophobia- Fear of opening one’s eyes Ostraconophobia- Fear of shellfish P Panophobia- Fear of everything Papyrophobia- Fear of paper Paraskavedekatriaphobia- Fear of Friday the 13th Peladophobia- Fear of bald people Phengophobia- Fear of daylight Phobophobia- Fear of fear Photophobia- Fear of light Phronemophobia- Fear of thinking Pogonophobia- Fear of beards S Sciophobia- Fear of shadows Scolionophobia- Fear of school Selenophobia- Fear of the moon Siderophobia- Fear of stars Sitophobia- Fear of food Sophophobia- Fear of learning Stasibasiphobia- Fear of walking T Thaasophobia- Fear of sitting Trichopathophobia- Fear of hair Triskadekaphobia- Fear of the number 13 V Verbophobia- Fear of words X Xanthophobia- Fear of the color yellow